Week 4 Journal Entries

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Jared Rascher
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Week 4 Journal Entries

Post by Jared Rascher »

Time for those Week Four Journal entries!

We've been in the Delta Quadrant since 48315.6, and the most recent date we have before this week's episodes is 49373.4, so it's been about a year since Voyager has been trying to get home.
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Re: Week 4 Journal Entries

Post by Jared Rascher »

Personal Log: Ensign Talum

Stardate: Post Meld

We had some false starts when it comes to experimental warp trials. As much as I like controlling the space I am in, and the number of people I interact with at once, sitting on this deck working at my station, I feel like people are willing to mess with me more, because they know I won't follow up. Jenny and Megan had me going for a while, telling me that the Captain and Lt. Paris got lost during their warp trials and turned into lizards.

I was almost ready to talk to Ensign Wildman about if this was even possible, but when Jenny and Megan said that the Captain and Paris had lizard babies, I knew they were messing with me. I'll be interested to see if I can make heads or tails of the warp data once it gets to me for processing.

Just when things were starting to get back to normal, we had some of the most disturbing news we've ever gotten on the ship. This is worse than finding out that Seska was actually a Cardassian hiding among us and plotting against us. In this case, we actually had a member of the crew that has murdered another crew member. I didn't know crewman Darwin, and I've only seen Suder in passing, but he always set me on edge.

When we first got stranded in the Delta Quadrant, I didn't think much of the Maquis or their conflict with the Federation. Now, a year after being in the Delta Quadrant, on a ship with people I have worked next to day to day, I'm starting to worry more about the kind of vetting process a violent political movement puts potential members through. I don't want to think about any of my fellow crew members this way. From my interactions, I trust Commander Chakotay, and I like Lt. Torres. But who else is out there that just wanted to join the Maquis because they couldn't live in Federation society?

Why am I thinking this way, now? I'm kind of ashamed of myself. I need to close this log now. Maybe intentionally reach out to some of our Maquis crew members to make some connections.
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Re: Week 4 Journal Entries

Post by Jared Rascher »

Personal Log: Ensign Talum

Stardate: Post Dreadnaught

I am increasingly feeling like my joke about Engineering destroying the ship was in bad taste. Because Engineering almost destroyed the ship, again. I'm writing this as I'm settling back in to my post, after leaving the ship on an escape pod. Captain Janeway almost self-destructed the ship in order to destroy a Cardassian superweapon that was on it's way to a planet.

How did a Cardassian super-weapon get in the Delta Quadrant? Apparently, Lt. Torres redirected the Cardassian super-weapon back when our Maquis crewmembers were still fighting the Cardassians. But not long before the rest of us got pulled into the Delta Quadrant by the Caretaker, the dreadnaught got pulled in as well. Then it recontextualized the Delta Quadrat as the Alpha Quadrant.

I should be a little upset by this turn of events, but honestly, I'm kind of amazed at the work Lt. Torres managed to do on the dreadnaught, both when she reprogrammed it a year ago, and the work she just did to disarm the super-weapon.

Also, if I wasn't convinced of this before, I'm pretty sure the Cardassian military does not have a concept of "proportional response" after seeing them develop this kind of superweapon to take out insurgent guerillas on their border worlds. Honestly, aren't there any number of other things they could have sunk their resources into that weren't a single-use planet killer meant to send a message?

Unfortunately, since the dreadnaught blew up, I won't get to look at any of the data from the ship. I know, it was more "engineering" than "sciences," but I would have loved to have seen some of the AI routines, because those seemed REALLY advanced for this kind of military application, and the ability of Lt. Torres to manipulating is pretty amazing.
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Re: Week 4 Journal Entries

Post by Jared Rascher »

Personal Log: Ensign Talum

Stardate: Post Death Wish

We went to red alert. I thought we were going to be attacked by the Kazon, or by the Trabe, or maybe the Vidiians. We haven't run into a spatial anomaly in a while, even though previously there seemed to be an abundance of them in the Delta Quadrant. As it turns out, the Captain and the senior crew were involved in some kind of hearing involving the super-powerful beings known as the Q. I just know the Q are powerful and exist outside of our usual understanding of time and space, and have something to do with the Federation learning about the Borg, and that giant anti-time eruption from a few years back.

Sometimes I'm okay with not knowing what the bridge crew has to deal with. I am a little curious if this was the same Q that showed up in previous records, or is this another manifestation of their culture? Anyway, I'm going to process these reports.
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Re: Week 4 Journal Entries

Post by Jared Rascher »

Personal Log: Ensign Talum

Stardate: Post Lifesigns

I was just thinking about the Vidiians, and we have run into a member of the species again. We had a situation where a Vidiian was injured and on a shuttle. The Doctor apparently worked some wonders on her, and she went on her way. I never got to meet her directly, but I'm hoping that if we had positive contact with the Vidiians, maybe we can take them off the list of potential threats?

I mean, it's terrible that they beam people's organs out of their bodies, but it's also terrible that they are afflicted with such a nasty disease that they cannot do anything other than managing their own collapse. If we were back in the Federation, maybe we could help them. We could do more. Right now, all we can do is hope that they find a breakthrough while staying out of their way.
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Re: Week 4 Journal Entries

Post by Jared Rascher »

Personal Log: Ensign Talum

Stardate: Post Investigations

We've had some weird things going on lately. Neelix started up some kind of "morning show" where he editorializes events on the ship, has guests, and shares relevant news. It's less formal than a briefing, although I'm kind of surprised that Captain Janeway and Commander Chakotay weren't more put out by some of Neelix's personal opinions expressed. Anyway, there is a wild ride coming up, because in a few days time, Neelix lays out how Lt. Paris is a traitor working with Seska and the Kazon, and a few days later, we find out that he was actually undercover.

Apparently crewman Jonas was the actual traitor, in contact with the Kazon and Seska. I really am tired of all of these sleeper agents and serial killers. I just want to know that we can trust everyone on the ship. Is that too much? I don't need to get along with everyone, I just don't want to feel like they are actively undermining the ship at every turn.
Last edited by Jared Rascher on Sun Apr 04, 2021 10:43 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Week 4 Journal Entries

Post by Jared Rascher »

Personal Log: Ensign Talum

Stardate: Post Deadlock

Ekon, I know I haven't written you in a while. Something has happened, and it's very disturbing, and the only way I can think to sort it out is to speak to someone . . . even if I'm never going to see your side of the conversation. I know I should have been writing you more, even if you never see these, but I need to write you now. There is so much going on.

It's not strange that we found evidence of quantum string theory. We've had evidence of that for centuries. We know there are alternate realities, and nothing we know about alternate realities discounts the broadest theories about quantum strings, in that any significant decision point or instance where random chance is equally like might cause an alternate reality to spawn.

One hypothesis is that relatively minor decision points might cause minor string deviation, which quickly collapses in on itself. In other words, you might be equally likely to wear two different shirts, and briefly, both quantum strings will exist, but when that decision point is no longer important, the strings realign. According to this hypothesis, the longer the timeline stretches on, the more momentous events have to be to avoid collapsing into the parent string, with the string consolidated into a single string at the beginning and end of time.

I mention all of this because I needed some scientific distance from what happened to us. Effectively our proximity to a plasma drift, and the literal likelihood of us performing similar options at the same time, accelerated our separation into a quantum thread, which immediately collapsed, resulting in both Voyagers from both quantum threads existing at the same point in the same time, overlapping one another through our connection to subspace. One Voyagers was draining antimatter from the other via the pulses we were attempting to use to help us determine what was happening.

We ended up in this situation because we were on the run from the Vidiians. The species I was hoping that maybe, someday, we could be at peace with. Who can also do horrible things to our bodies if they aren't at peace with us.

I have the science out of the way, so let me tell you what unsettles me. Let me tell you why I've had nightmares every night since I processed the data from this mission.

1. Samantha Wildman, one of the few people I feel as if I could call a friend, died on the other Voyager. Which was only "not us" by random chance.

2. Samantha lost her baby, but the baby from the other Voyager is here, now.

3. Ensign Kim died here, but the Ensign Kim from the other Voyager came here, with the baby.

Ekon . . . we could have had our organs beamed out of our bodies. We could have self-destructed. One of my friends could have died. She lost her baby, but another version of her didn't and that baby is here now. We have a crew member that was from a separate quantum thread that replaced a dead crew member.

How can I stay sane in the middle of all of this? What does it mean to be me? For a brief nanosecond, I was the Ensign Talum on both Voyagers, before we existed on top of one another in subspace. I have no memory of it, but I died. What did I do on that Voyager before the end? Obviously nothing helpful, or else it wouldn't have ceased to exist. Does it matter that I exist? What do I contribute to any reality?

This wasn't a difference of the two Voyagers caused by some important historical matter. This was a split-second moment exacerbated by a plasma flare. Am I real? Did the version of me that went through Starfleet, and fell for someone I thought was a friend, did that version of me die? Do I have any right to remember my past?

We haven't explored the philosophy of quantum string fraying incidents in the past, but in almost every instance where such alternate quantum strings are logged, the inciting incident was far in the past, certainly more than a few hours ago.

What I want more than anything is to hear you tell me that I'm the Ensign Talum that you knew a year ago. I think for right now, picturing you telling me that might keep me sane.
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Re: Week 4 Journal Entries

Post by Jared Rascher »

Personal Log: Ensign Talum

Stardate: Post Tuvix

I saw Samantha's child. She named the child Naomi, and the child is adorable. Also, I had heard that those cranial ridges became lodged during the delivery and . . . I don't know that I want to ask Samantha about that development.

I requested data logs for the most recent set of files I needed to process be assigned to someone else. I am not close to Lt. Tuvok, or to Mr. Neelix, but the logs involve existential questions and . . . I still feel very raw about that topic right now.
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Re: Week 4 Journal Entries

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Ensign Z Vahino Personal Log
Stardate: During Investigations

Finally, that idiot Paris has made himself enough enemies to leave Voyager. I never liked him, and he stole my promotion. Brash (curse word deleted). Neelix gave a beautiful tribute to him on the annoying new morning show. I get that people like Paris... people that don't have to work with him anyway. He can be charming and his arrogance can be seen as any number of things. There's not a lot to focus on, so a lot of us have been pouring ourselves into our work. I am obviously the best candidate to replace Paris. I have the track record to prove it.

With my supervisor's permission, I spoke to Captain Janeway to let her know of my desire to become a bridge officer. I didn't mention Paris, but she said it was obvious this was because of the opening. I said I would be willing to pursue other opportunities as well, but this one is highly fitting for me given my experience and training. She said she and the Commander were interviewing candidates and would schedule an interview with me in the upcoming week.

I didn't get the feeling she was too enthusiastic about the possibility of me taking the position. I like the Captain. I would like to serve more directly with her. If this trip is going to be another 74 years, I doubt she'll stay in command that long. She'll need to bring up younger officers to take over. I'd like to be one of those younger officers. I didn't say that to her, of course. I don't want to insinuate she won't be capable of commanding for the next 74 years. She probably will be. It's just a tough job to have all that responsibility on your shoulders without any breaks. I can't imagine the hours she works and the amount of stress she has. Maybe I'm the stupid one for wanting to step up into that. I'm just so bored.
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Re: Week 4 Journal Entries

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Ensign Z Vahino Personal Log
Stardate: During Death Wish
CN: Suicide, assisted suicide

Captain Janeway called me to her ready room to ask me about Bolian views on suicide. I have no idea what's going on. There's been some weird turbulation recently, so maybe something's wrong with the engines. But I know all the Bolians on board. None of them have seemed suicidal. None of them are currently suffering to the point they would want to pursue suicide that I know of. That feels like something they would seek out other Bolians to talk about with.

I told the Captain about my Auncle Xaiw. They chose to end their life after several years of living with a progressive disease. They were diagnosed before I was born. I remember as a child how enthusiastic Auncle Xaiw was about everything. How that slowly diminished as I got older until my Auncle could barely move at all. My parents brought them to live with us when I was a teenager. Auncle Xaiw said they felt trapped. All three of my parents at different times said they felt trapped, too, by the responsibility of care.

Auncle Xaiw's decision made me sad. It still does. I felt it especially as we prepared for my cousin Qedar's wedding which was scheduled to happen about ten months ago. It would have been nice if our Auncle could have been there. It would've been nice if I could've been there. But that's a different issue.

I don't know if this helped the Captain. I think she understood how seriously we take the double effect principle. It's not a light decision nor is it a decision most Bolians make alone. Being out here in the Delta quadrant, I haven't thought about the double effect principle. I wonder if I give it some thought I'll feel differently about it. Now there's a different community to worry about.
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